Lookville.com

So...I got this invitation to join this website called Lookville and I was honestly a bit skeptical about it. I didn't really understand why I should join a social network that none of my friends were actually using...but it has been the source of quite a bit of fun for me lately.
Basically you set up a profile...only takes a few minutes. Then you post pictures of either yourself, or models in clothing, and you ask a question. Then it's posted up and anyone can view it and answer your question. It has me thinking a lot more about fashion...which is something I really really like. I think that perhaps im going to start a "Fashion Friday" where I post up things that I think are cute and fun, a new outfit I may have, and/or a makeup tutorial or something.
I get a lot of comments on my fashion all the time. I think I should share some of my stuff online. Obviously most of my stuff will be from a plus size point of view, and it won't be super on trend fashion. It will be my own brand of cool. In anycase...I can't wait to share it with you guys. First post will be on Friday.

In an attempt to be relevant...or at least visable

I now have a web presence on Tumblr. Im still not really sure about the site, but my blog there certainly does look very cool. I like this blogspot because of the ease of post...but I think it will be cool to cross post my blogs here over to tumblr.

Anyway if you happen to be on tumblr and want to follow me, my url is http://janwicked.tumblr.com/
Follow me up...Im gonna go watch Maury Povich! YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER! hahaha

Friendship

Girl world is often times tough to traverse. We have complex emotions, hormone levels that are constantly up and down, and we all expect way too much from each other. Friendships tend to ebb and flow it seems. There are the good times, the bad times, the epic nights, and the epic fights. It seems that all of these things go together to create what we know as a friendship.
Lately I have found that being a friend is much more fun for me than I could have imagined. I had a pretty epic birthday party and I was surrounded by so many amazing friends. Sure there were a few people sprinkled about that were just there to say they were there, but all in all it was a great learning experience. It encouraged me to loosen up and let people in a little bit.
I have had a lot of issues with giving too much of myself and ending up feeling burned by it. I made a commitment to myself about 4 years ago that I was going to stop giving so much and simply live my life for me. It was a 4 year long process of purging myself of toxicity. Bad girlfriends, bad habits, bad choices...all of these things that I felt were dragging my social stock down. I decided that to have good friends, and for people to like me, it was probably best if I liked myself.
Now that I am who I am today, I have been constantly working to make myself better. Can you believe that I actually have had people in my life who think that it is a character flaw that I think im a great person? Obviously these people are not a major part of my life these days. One of the things that I hadn't quite been able to work on was my tendency to kick people out of my life and not talk to them. I have flaws just like everyone, and it's really easy for me (unfortunately) to tell someone if you don't like me you can piss the fuck off...and in most cases people will do exactly that. I have recently had the opportunity to patch things up with a few people. I always look on these chances as a golden opportunity.
I patched things up with a friend of mine that I have had since I was a little girl, and I think that this opportunity came at a good time for the both of us. I have been in desperate need of a good girlfriend that is close by, and some things have been happening in her life recently as well...we both needed each other. I also kinda buried the hatchet so to speak with my...um...girlfriend?...exgirlfriend?...it's hard to say. I found out that she was pregnant and I sent her an olive branch email because I am sure that she is really nervous about it and could use someone that cares about her...and let's face it, I do care about her a lot.
Friendship is hard and it takes a lot of work...some sacrifices...some bartering...and A LOT of compromise. But isn't it just totally worth it?

I haven't posted a blog in a few days...

...and im real sorry...life has just kinda been a dull event. Not much to talk about and not a lot of feelings. I do however have a blog to post up about friendship but I am going to probably wait until later to do that.

Anyone got any B-12? I feel like ballsacks today!

Phuk The Politics 2

Phuk The Politics 2 was a serious blast yet again! For those of you that aren't aware of this party series yet, you seriously need to experience it for yourself. Remember the days when you could walk into a club and before the night was over you had made friendships and connections with people instead of staying stuck in your small group of friends. The day when everyone danced like nobody was watching? Maybe even the days when everything glowed and the beat pulsed, and everyone smiled at you? This is what Phuk The Politics is!

Phukheadz is the vision of Byron Brown of Jacksonville, Florida! His little orange (and sometimes multicolored) men seem to pop up in every corner of the Underground Scene and the mainstream as well. The Loyal Order of Phuk or the L.O.O.P. includes such noteables as Willie Nelson, Cheech, and Juliette Lewis. It also is a who's who of Jacksonville DJ's, Entertainers, and Club Kids alike.
When you receive your phukhead it comes in a box signed by Byron that is also numbered. Byron takes your picture and adds you to the L.O.O.P. and you are a part of a growing family of people dedicated to art and love! For more information check out the social networking pages http://www.facebook.com/phukheadz or http://www.myspace.com/phukheadz

I need a xanax...

Shit is pissing me off and I need a xanax. Ric and I were talking about escaping into the night...maybe we should...

Woah Horoscope!

You have reached a turning point and it's up to you to decide what comes next. It's time for you to wipe the slate clean so you aren't limited by yesterday's plans. The Taurus New Moon activates your 1st House of Self, enabling you to exert a higher level of self-determination over the weeks ahead if you are willing to make a decision today. But choosing which road to take isn't enough; you must also commit to giving one hundred percent until you accomplish your goal.


That is some crazy stuff. I feel like that is exactly where I am right now. I have so much going on in my head lately that I can barely sleep. There is so much that I want to do, to see, to learn that I am in sponge mode. I feel like I have gotten to a place where I can really see my goals on the horizon and the past is all but a distant memory. A place that I can say I was...a bad place that didn't claim me!
Im actually proud of myself for what I have accomplished and for the person I am today. I get a lot of feedback these days and I am really starting to see that other people are noticing the positive changes in me.